It’s very rare that the voices of queer children get heard. Most experiences come from adults or barely-still-teens, talking about their childhood.
For example the experience of Elias, a trans man. He talks about not identifying with his assigned gender at the age of 3 to 4 years. First, he felt confused. He questioned himself. Maybe he is wrong or weird? Everyone around him is so sure: You are a girl. He starts looking for reasons, why he turned out like this. Why he has, in his own words, “grown wrong”. His parents always wanted a daughter, they must have done something to make him grow up as a girl. Suspicion rises, together with self doubt. Hearing the sentence “You’re turning into a woman” after getting his first period, makes him panic. Combined with other negative experiences, this is where suicidal thoughts arise. Turning into a woman is like a lifelong prison sentence. He found a friend group that doesn’t reproduce gender roles, started feeling better, but kept on getting bullied from outside of the group and the feeling of being “wrong” stayed with him. He’s trying his hardest not to come out in front of his family, so he doesn’t inconvenience them. He looks at himself as the lowest point of society, learns to hate himself. Only faces rejection because of his gender. Depression and anxiety disorder were not made by being trans, but by society.
IO report.
LILLY report.
Lucius report.
anonymous child, 6y, report:
Being a girl is wrong, but being a boy is kind of hard. Everything is not right, I don’t want to talk about that anymore. I’d prefer to be nothing at all.
Lived reality of trans children and adolescents. Society makes them suicidall, 42% of trans teens have thought about it at least once. We are all watching, we know it, but we don’t do enough to stop it. The website queer.de is known for queer activism, education and experiences. On April 1st this year, they published a report talking about the plans to open a queer shelter in Berlin for trans teens. A shelter that many people are urgently waiting for, a place that could be a home to so many teens, that could take the pain away from them. A shelter that can be visited without parental permission. All of that is urgently needed. All of that gives a lot of hope. But that was an april fools joke by queer.de. A joke, which the affected people pay for. The only result are shattered hope and more attacks against trans people. The teens can not even rely on their own community. A lot of talking, and reassuring but no thought of them when it really matters. There are shelters, yes. Sorted by genitalia. Trans girls are not allowed in girls’ shelters by rule. There are exceptions, but in general it’s too much already, that people have to ask that question in a sensitive place like that. Children and adolescents are extremely dependent on their parents. Children believe their parents. It takes a long time for kids to realize that their parents don’t know everything. That they are wrong sometimes. They are at the mercy of whatever their parents say. And when they finally realize, puberty is already playing its game. Works with hormones, causes chaos. And additionally to this chaos, there’s being trans. And that’s why the teens need our support. Reliable offers, education, visible shelters and people who help them find their way in society! We have to start in kindergarten. Not wait until the child talks about being trans. At that point, too much damage is done. Being trans and genderqueer has to become a visible and valid reality. We celebrate every single visible trans person. Trans cuties: You have a hard way, most of you live in constant suspicion and always have to think about if it’s safe to come out. If you’re getting home safely and who you’re with. But each and every trans person makes this way easier for the next generation. The more normal it is, the more we talk about it, the bigger the fight, the easier it becomes for the next generation. So this is the time for a very serious Thank You! But the fight can not be fought by trans people alone. Allies are needed! We have to support wherever we can. The privilege of being cisgender can be used to spare some pain. It’s a daily fight over pure existence. To not break on society, just to be beaten to hospital by fascists. We want to use this moment to show solidarity to demo paramedic Iza, who was at the hospital shortly before June 3rd because of fascists – Don’t worry, she gave them some in return. And she was on the streets despite her concussion one weekend later to help activists. We can’t accept this as life reality of trans people any longer! We can’t accept it to be not unexpected, but realistic risk of being trans, to get beaten up and murdered! And that is why we need all of you, dear allies, and soon-to-be-allies” Get started, there’s a lot to do!