About Anger<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I should \u201ework on my anger issues\u201c, they said when I was a child. After I again retreated in the chamber at the side of our class room because everything was just too much. I should \u201ework on my temper\u201c, I was told after I had to endure one of the harassments of the school bullies again. Because \u201ethere\u2018re always two sides to the conflict\u201c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I grew up in a society I didn\u2018t understand. With its countless rules, that were like this \u201ejust because\u201c. Where Othering was the consequence of not obeying and questioning was heavily discouraged.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2018ve always been somehow \u201edifferent\u201c. At least this part they noticed. Enough at least for an \u201eADHD\u201c diagnosis. Then they knew what was \u201ebroken\u201c about myself \u2013 my \u201eattention deficit\u201c and the \u201ehyperactivity\u201c \u2013 yey, there\u2018s medication that was supposed to make me more \u201enormal\u201c. Oh, the \u201etemper tantrums\u201c were still there? Guess I have to continue working on my \u201eanger issues\u201c then.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Most importantly, I should obey their imagination of how to live. However, I\u2018ve never been somewhat decent at this. Too restrictive for myself \u2013 being locked in the dreariness being religiously worshipped as \u201eNormality\u201c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201eYou should go to parties, then you\u2018d get to know some people!\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201eHow about finally getting a girlfriend?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201eIt\u2018s kinda unusual not loving driving a car as a \u201amen\u2018\u201c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201eYou should go outside more often instead of sitting in front of the computer all day\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201eDon\u2018t be like that!\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I grew up in a society which didn\u2018t understand me. That never had to understand me because I\u2018m in the minority. \u201eJust be yourself, but not like that!\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Hermeneutical Injustice is the term for when people are not able to understand their own experiences or to make others understand them. If they lack proper words and others don\u2018t believe them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That there are words for this, I only learned much later.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That I\u2018m nonbinary and why I don\u2018t care about all this \u201emanly men\u201c stuff, I only learned much later.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That I\u2018m autistic and that meltdowns are caused by an overload of the brain, not by \u201etemper\u201c, I only learned much later.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That my kinks are completely okay and how to communicate them and that I don\u2018t have to hide myself for my entire life, I only learned much later.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That I want to live polyamouous, that there is the Double Empathy problem and I\u2018m in fact not socially incapable, I only learned much later.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Today I know that there are words for this. Today I know, that I\u2018m neuroqueer and that cishetero-monogamous-vanilla-Normativity does not work for myself, no matter how much gaslighting I endure over decades.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
What if I knew all those words 20 years ago already? What if concepts of alternative relationship models, consent and the existence of kink would have been taught and speaking already early on about it being normalized? What if every human would have the chance to learn about their own neurotype and get access to neuroaffirmative resources and support?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Unfortunately, reality hits different.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Reality is, that a diagnosis was named after an NS-murderer for decades \u2013 oh and of course, the ICD-10 still remains in use widely.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Reality is, that an autism \u201etherapy\u201c is still advertised which has the same roots as conversion \u201etherapy\u201c for homosexuality.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Reality is, that they call being neurodivergent it a \u201etrend\u201c. Just like left-handedness being a \u201etrend\u201c long ago.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Reality is that Autistics are still seen as broken Allistics. They call us \u201epeople with autism\u201c and \u201epeople that suffer from autism\u201c. As if autism was a separate thing from us. As if there was an allistic person hiding under the \u201ehorrendrous autism\u201c that they\u2018d like to \u201ecure\u201c. I don\u2018t want to be neurotypical, I want to be myself. Just imagine they\u2018d talk about \u201epeople with homosexuality\u201c. About \u201epeople suffering from queerness\u201c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Reality is, that many are taken even less seriously if not officially diagnosed, ideally by an Allistic doctor. They don\u2018t care that self-identication is pretty accurate when it comes to autism and that most people research a damn lot about this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Reality is, that it is extremely difficult to get diagnosed as an adult. Brutally conservative autism ambulances with years of waiting time are often the only option. It\u2018s especially difficult in Saxony \u2013 the autism ambulance at the Uniklinik does not take any adults on their waiting list anymore.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Reality is, that professionals often have absolutely no clue about neurodivergence. Privileges, arrogance, old myths. There\u2018s not a single week I do not hear horror stories: \u201eADHD? That cannot be, because you\u2018re studying\u201c, \u201eAutism? Nah, you made eye contact with me\u201c, or my all-time favourite: \u201eYou cannot be autistic, you\u2018re attractive\u201c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Being perceived female, plus trauma? Here\u2018s your borderline diagnosis!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Reality is, that many organizations had to sign a joint statement to the new US government to emphasize that vaccines do not cause autism. That in Great Britain, they plan that every trans child should get tested for Autism in order to take away their right for self-determination.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
An US health minister who wants to introduce a central registry to research \u201ethe true cause of autism\u201c in order to \u201efight autism\u201c. It\u2018s already known for long that neurotypes such as autism are mainly genetic. You can probably conclude in which direction this will lead.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Reality is that public nazi salutes from Elon Musk are being portrayed by German media as \u201eclumsy gesture of an autistic man\u201c. As if Autistics did not know what a nazi salute is. BULL. SHIT.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2018m angry. At the arrogance and ignorance that we neuroqueers face. I\u2018m angry that people are being judged by how well they \u201efunction\u201c for a normative society \u2013 and that they\u2018d love to get rid of people they do not consider \u201efunctioning\u201c well enough. That they want to destroy all the progress made so far, taking the newly found words away again and bring us fascist suppression instead. I am angry that so many people are still completely lost in their collective normative trance and do not see what is happening right in front of our eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Anti-fascist queerfeminism also has to be neuroqueer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I should work on my anger? Of course. But definitely not as you imagined.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Alerta, alerta, antifascista!<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" About Anger I should \u201ework on my anger issues\u201c, they said when I was a child. After I again retreated in the chamber at the side of our class room because everything was just too much. I should \u201ework on my temper\u201c, I was told after I had to endure one of the harassments of … Luux (dey\/denen): Neurodivergence<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-1799","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.queerpridedd.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1799","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.queerpridedd.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.queerpridedd.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.queerpridedd.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.queerpridedd.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1799"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.queerpridedd.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1799\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1800,"href":"https:\/\/www.queerpridedd.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1799\/revisions\/1800"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.queerpridedd.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1799"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}